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the fading music
Kai
20+
Currently in National Service
Totally in love with Baobei
^.^

the endless piece

HoMe - panio and i

the new melodies
Baobei

the gone memories
March 2007
April 2007
May 2007
September 2007
February 2008
March 2008
April 2008
May 2008
June 2008
July 2008
August 2008
September 2008
December 2008
March 2009
April 2009
August 2009
March 2010
July 2010
October 2010

the thanks given
brushes: one two three
fonts: one
hosts: one two three
designer: one
lyrics: one
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Thursday, June 26, 2008
The wind stop......awhile
Ytd i was so happy that i can finally meet my dear ...=)...the feeling was just so happy and my aaction is just wanna hug her tight tight....XD .....felt so happy when i hug her ...........so happy that we can accompany each other for that one whole day ^_^ .........we shop orchard go cinneleisure 1st then the hilreen where we saw chrislyn ............had a long chat understanding how she is at the moment .........seems not like wat she wan.........kind of feel sad for her hope that in the future she is able to meet someone nice and her life will be brighten up.................then after that we go to coffee bean chat chat ............chat out alot of thing .............and reveal everything to my bao bei .........................ooooo night time we go her park there sit sit eat eat and chat again...till...i...go...home...a.n..d...found out something............somehow i lost myself i cant totally feel "me" as me i suddenly forget wats my name i forget who am i i suddenly lost something inside me that make me just only know wat is dunno dunno i dunno that s all i feel fear and coldeness i feel ..................i dunno ..........its so strange as if someone or something pull something me inside out even till now when im working i just now even forget to put on lunch time and carry on working...............its totally not like me ......in the past i will purposely wait until timing just nice and lunch time immediately yet i continue take up call ........i ask my colleagues y nobody say 2 but there is yet im so near the person who say 2 but i did not hear it ................wat is happening to me??????????????i use msg to msg my bao bei to grab hold of myself even now myself i try to use the feeling is not as powerful as in the past izzit my power of feeling is lost?or am i growing without my notice or i fallen without myself noticing ...................can only felt i am like a zombie freak or machine that ppl ask me do wat i do wat ...................and suddenly i start to dislike human just like my past ..............fighting with another me now ........................i felt something inside me is awaken abit but wat is the thing awake i can only feel fear for that awakening lucky is awaken by abit ..................or have i slowly start to lose my............... humanity?Dun think so just that some bad thing is brewing inside me .........wat izzit .......i wanna know.........or wat is the thing that make me feel lost ................i dunno........i dunno........that night the wind stop blowing when im asleep.....................
6:43 PM; &they are gone forever

Tuesday, June 24, 2008
swing sway sway
BOOMMMMM................this time round i bombard my ownself le sob sob trying my best to handle everything in life but just that life is not easy especially for working life........T.T.........
Falling very very very verrrrrrrrrriiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii..................fast .........falling and falling.............trying my best not to be press down totally by the society........
i miss my bao bei sob sob i miss her so much ..............if its not for her i believe im totally crush now and brought out another me .................the society is just so cruel...............i miss my studying life .........i miss my serenity life ........peace in my heart calm in my soul ...............now is like i throw myself into a fire pitt where i cant get out ...................super painful .................only left with one hope that i can hold on to carry on walking..............ytd really down totally demoralised and almost lost in myself and scare of going back to nothingnesss suddenly ytd "time" come back my body and scare me ...........its just grab my heart and mind and make me lost in myself almost lost in my self totally sob sob lucky still got last piece of shard in my heart shining for me..........the last time i felt "Time" was in my poly year 1 but never thought now i would felt it back its so scary ytd time came back and tune the time forward and scare me .............lucky ytd bao bei got pei me in msn in the night that make me forget about it............my bao bei still the strongest able to make me feel so much better ./......there are times my bao bei is right i see too far ahead and got to start look wats in front of me .........but somehow i felt even though i seal up my ability and reset my ability back to zero and retrain myself in order to suits the working environment i lose even more and more ..............somehow my ability should say is a double edge sword or is a weapon there are soemtimes im force to take it up but there are alot of time im so afraid of taking up the sword somehow...................if i take up the sword i can say myself someone powerful over power ........but it will fill up and increase my sadness...........i finally found y im so pessimistic le ...............the only solution that i can calm my another me is through sad song LOL through sad song then they will be able to stop their movement and start to calm down .....................but i promise someone i wun be pessimistic and emo so wun do it so easily de..............i miss my bao bei...............i endure le endure 2 day no see her...............pengz............if the rain were to come again i think all my feeling for missing her will pour out totally too then i hope i can stand inside the rain cause like that no one will know thats my tear le ......................I MISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS HERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR T.T trying my best to control le just cant help feeling that T.T
6:55 PM; &they are gone forever

Sunday, June 8, 2008
horoscope..........

CAPRICORN MAN

A man in this Zodiac will has a pair of round big beautiful eyes, a nicestructure jaw line. He is a good listener and can understand everythingeasily and clearly. He can guess what you will say before you even say it.He often shakes his head or touch his hair. He is a big built, but he willtend to have a small ear. He tends to have a darker shade of hair and eyes'color. He will likely have a short and strong neck, broad shoulder,muscular, strong hands and grips. He has a shorter fingers compare to theman of the same size and same height in the other zodiac. His hands can workwell at the same time can protect and care for his woman.His height will be proportional to his weight. He willwalk firmly andalways take a big long step. As he walks he will look around in caution withno disturbance from his problems at present or in the past. He likes towatch things built with fascinate and wonder about how it is done, so youcould see him watching a construction site and not get bored.He is a good dancer. He is a careful person in instinct, so even at dancefloor, he will already have to know what in front or behind him before hewill take any steps.Green is his favorite color. You will mostly see him wear green, navy, blue,or brown. In all 12 Zodiacs, he is the one who can get the most satisfactionfrom possession of beautiful thing, and cherish it as if it is very valuableto him even it is just a crystal ball made in France.It is his luck that he hardly has to chase after woman. They always comethemselveswithout his invitation. He likes to treat his guest in his housethan visiting his guest at their house. He does not like to be a center ofattention, so if you need his help, you have to look up for him. He liveshis life in stability and simplicity. Every decision made are already 'Sure'and carefully thought out. He will not do what he has been asked to do if heis not interested in doing it. He acts casually but in reality, he alwaysdoing things seriously.He loves peaceful and quiet environment so in his free time, he will stay athome instead of going out and look for adventure. He loves nature and dreamsof a nice and quiet house with lots of trees, or he may dream of a house ina beautiful countryside.He will let you have freedoms and watching you in a distance. If you areover doing something, he will let you know by hisicy cold look. He is theperfect lover in all the Zodiac for nothing he will not do for his love one.He won't allow people to laugh at him or think he is a joker, so he willspent for himself luxury for what it is worth.He likes neat and well dressed woman, so do not be a slop if you are datingthis guy. If you do that he will loose his face. He is the romantic type whowould dance with you under the moon light.Love will make him shines and you will see it in his face. He will not sayit out loud, you have to know it yourself.



TAURUS WOMAN

A slim moderately tall woman. Taurus woman is funny and a jolly person.Square facial bone structure, high cheek bone. Her round big eyes sparklewith wit and curiosity. You will not see many round faces Taurus women, andmainly she will have a strong jaw line.She is a constantly change person. If she up sets, she will not show it andwill keep it to herself for a long time, and will remember them so well. Ifshe gets really mad at you, you will suddenly become a totally andcompletely stranger to her.She is a patient person, but always need new excitement. She hates long talkmeeting, long and endless conversation. She can be in love with you today,and one day she could act as if she has never loved you before. She haspatient with what she wants to do and will never give up until she getsthere. She will be very persistent in what she is doing till she has reasonsfor stopping her project, then she will quit.Money for Taurus woman is not the most important factor in life. She thinksof money as an instrument for assuring of a good living. She has moresatisfaction in achieving her goals more than satisfaction in fine clothsand luxuries. If you like a woman who always thinks of love and romance,then you are dating the wrong girl. You can not tell her to stay at home,she likes to work and preferred not work at home.She loves animals and likes to surround by animals. Loveis in her head, butFreedom is in her soul. She has her own idea about love and afraid to showher true feeling for fear of rejection. She is not the type to talk aboutlove, but she sure has a strange way to show it. She is not good in showingwhen she is in love, but if she loves you she will be honest to you than anyother women.She will be honest to her love one, but at the same time seems distant. Youwill have a good relationship with her, if you allow her freedom. Do notforce her to be with you in a poker game which she hates, but let she goesout swinging with her friends if she wants to. She will be different thanother girls, and she thinks different is one of her unique quality. She is apublic figure but belongs to no one.She will not stay with you, if shethinks you are not sincere. She likes you to have personality, butbetternot to compete with her. Loves her, but not too much for she afraid it willlimiting her freedom.She always stand out of the crowd for something she dares to do. You couldsee her dress like a poor farmer dinning in the fancy restaurant, or dresslike a nun in an a cocktail dress party. If you are a politician who arelooking for a wife, she will make a good one because she is cleverly smartand she could get along socially with any type of crowds.She is not a jealous type because she has to know you thoroughly beforeaccepting you in her life. She has more curiosity in life than wondering ifright now you are flirting with someone else. If you keep a distant fromher, or go away for a few days, she will miss you more. Even when she isdating you, she also able to fond of someone else, if you do not havesomething she islooking for. She will never disappoint you or hide behindyour back to make you loose face, but she is the type who just going to tellyou to your face that ' We're better off breaking up'.She always remember her first love. Taurus woman holds the best record fordivorce for she does not care about how people think of her, but everythings should be done for 'Happiness'.She has lots of friends and sure of herself, so you will hardly see shedelays any of her thoughts before her action. If she think of something, shewill go ahead and does it. She has many men wanting her for her constantchanges is the challenge. She can be cute and funny, but suddenly cool andtough. She has her own style of dressing up, so you could see her dress likean old mate today, and tomorrow she may dress like she comes from Mars. Shewill have thatinteresting hair, dress and a look unique from anyone else.She likes to learn about your dreams and your thought. She has fun teasingyou and making jokes. If she did something wrong, she won't hide it fromyou, but do not ask when she is not in the mood to talk about it. She hatesto owe people money and take promise seriously. If you promise to pay herback, you'd better paid up.If you want to make it with Taurus woman, then do not be jealous orpossessive, do not be narrow minded, do not criticize about nonsense orsmall and insignificant matters. Try to likes her friends and let she hasher privacy, then she can be very sweet to you.

That is she and me
12:33 AM; &they are gone forever

piss........
Back again to same place here with sadness and angriness .............it was suppose to be a brand new day with everything good and was sunday however everything crumble down .......trying so hard to convince my gal that will help her in her life and really speak out my real feeling again and guess wat i receive a reply that look so loosely that as if my help was worthless yes even after that u msg me u appreciate ...........i treat her everything so seriously yet she say until like that ............am i suppose to be angry or wat i love her at the same time yet she totally piss me off at the same time ............the air con in my office is just so cold and as always i hide myself at one corner alone.........damn just freeze me to death can le .............i always say i wan cooldown but this time round i was hurt .........izzit my pride answer is no ................izzit me yes it is and i admit it myself ...........i gave her everything but now i found myself hanging nowhere she was suppose to the only line i can hold on but if she is gone den maybe its time for "me" to come out once more let blood flow let the eyes be awaken unlock the ability hidden in the brain to wake up if it happen i will be lost forever .............forever......
12:11 AM; &they are gone forever